How many jerks have to find you before you find a decent person? I mean, c'mon, these guys these days are complete jerks! The guy I had a date with the other night, yeah he used me, and never called me again. Big suprise on that one, I should've known better, he was in the Navy, no good has ever come from men in the military. At least none that I've found. So do I just find the wrong people or am I just a bad person? I havent figured it out yet, and its driving me nuts! I don't think I ask for too much, just someone to be happy with. I tried dating older guys, guys my age, guys a little younger, and it does no good, they all turn out to be the same! Ugh!

Sorry to rant, but I'm so frustrated!!!

well look at where you live.. hehe.. you're not a bad person.

------------------
1988 Aero 88 coupe.. 2.8l v6.. more mods to come.
Photo Gallery - Fiero Links - WebShop
I am the signature virus, please put me in your signature so I can spread

I would have to say that things have gotta be leanin towards the bad luck side much more than the bad person.
Sorry your date didnt turn out as wonderfully as you had hoped, and good luck to ya.

You're not a bad person. There are just a lot of jerks out there. And sometimes you find out early on in the game, sometimes you figure it out after about 10 years of marriage as a friend of ours just did. And it's not just women, it's not just men, it's not just someone you date, it's not just someone you thought you were friends with.....it covers the whole spectrum. It makes the keepers all that more precious....few that there are. But those few ARE out there....keep the faith and don't become so cynical that you don't recognize the good ones when you find them. Tuff, but doable...as I'm challenged by cynicism myself

quote Originally posted by Pegasus8295: And it's not just women, it's not just men, it's not just someone you date, it's not just someone you thought you were friends with.....it covers the whole spectrum. It makes the keepers all that more precious

very true.personal integrity is at a all time low.

Its so hard to not just throw my arms up and say that I give up. I just don't understand what makes a person want to do another person wrong. It just doesnt register with me. Like how can a person just treat another person SO BAD and not even care?! How does it not bother them? Maybe one of my problems is that I can be too nice and too trusting, maybe I should learn how to control myself so that I dont open up. Idunno anymore, I just know that its going to drive me nuts until I figure it out!

With one exception, I met a ton of jerks before I met Matt. And I mean a lot - I was considering looking into buying jerk repellent!

Jen

quote Originally posted by sarabear: The guy I had a date with the other night, yeah he used me, and never called me again. Big suprise on that one, Sorry to rant, but I'm so frustrated!!!

Does that mean you boffed him the first night.. Cause yeah, we frown upon that for relationships.

quote Originally posted by JohnnyK: Does that mean you boffed him the first night.. Cause yeah, we frown upon that for relationships.

We do?

I mean ....yeah, right.... Sara what were you thinking?

quote Originally posted by pokeyfiero: We do? I mean ....yeah, right.... Sara what were you thinking?

Well at least the guys I know, if we're looking for a relationship, it's nice if the girl slows things down a little.. Kinda throws guys (at least all the ones I know) off if you think your possible girlfriend is a little... promiscuous..

quote Originally posted by JohnnyK: Well at least the guys I know, if we're looking for a relationship, it's nice if the girl slows things down a little.. Kinda throws guys (at least all the ones I know) off if you think your possible girlfriend is a little... promiscuous..

I think I stopped looking for keepers.It made having the non keepers no fun.
I feel Saras pain but I am refusing to care for awhile.

quote Originally posted by sarabear:

Cracks knuckels.... cracks neck.... rubs temples..... shakes hands..... exercises fingers..... clears mind....awaits tomorows dream interpritation question......

quote Originally posted by sarabear: Its so hard to not just throw my arms up and say that I give up. I just don't understand what makes a person want to do another person wrong. It just doesnt register with me. Like how can a person just treat another person SO BAD and not even care?! How does it not bother them? Maybe one of my problems is that I can be too nice and too trusting, maybe I should learn how to control myself so that I dont open up. Idunno anymore, I just know that its going to drive me nuts until I figure it out!

Alot of people are all about Me Me Me.
What I want.
What can I get.
I won't get to close to people, becouse that takes from ME.

I will take from a person, and give nothing in return, becouse it's all about ME.
Use um' up and throw em' away. That way I won't have to commit to anything that might take from ME.

I don't want to put in all that work for longterm pleasure, so I'll tell them what they want to hear, snatch that short term high, dump em' and move on, to suck all the Love, Trust, and Joy, out of another innocent soul.

Any thing else is TOO much work, and that takes from ME.

I see a LOT of very selfesh people everyday.
It's all about the instant gratifcation, without any consiquince.
And the ME ME ME.

Maybe I didnt use the best judgement with him. I mean, its not really my thing to just barely know someone and sleep with them. I would've NEVER done it, if he hadn't been saying that he wanted a relationship, or that he wanted to get to know me, and all that crap. If he was just like "Hey, I want some booty", then NO I wouldnt have done it. I am by no means a slut and I dont really appreciate it being implied. When your lonely, and a guy tells you everything you want to hear, its hard not to fall into the trap. Another lesson learned in life I guess.

Please dont be mean, its hard enough trying to deal with it on my own, much less getting criticized from some of you. Thanks

-S

quote Originally posted by sarabear: Maybe I didnt use the best judgement with him. I mean, its not really my thing to just barely know someone and sleep with them. I would've NEVER done it, if he hadn't been saying that he wanted a relationship, or that he wanted to get to know me, and all that crap. If he was just like "Hey, I want some booty", then NO I wouldnt have done it. I am by no means a slut and I dont really appreciate it being implied. When your lonely, and a guy tells you everything you want to hear, its hard not to fall into the trap. Another lesson learned in life I guess. Please dont be mean, its hard enough trying to deal with it on my own, much less getting criticized from some of you. Thanks -S

Wasn't intending to be mean at all, but you said it, and asked for opinions, and coming from a guy, that is how I would respond at least.

Oh well, its all good I guess....life goes on

quote Originally posted by pokeyfiero: personal integrity is at a all time low.

I'm going to have to agree with you on this one, there seems to be a lack of integrity out there. Or honor for that matter.

[This message has been edited by 84SupperDuty (edited 01-04-2005).]

so you got dinner and you got laid....now if the guy took you to mcdonalds for dinner and only had a 2 inch penis by all means smear his rep all over town in female bathroom stalls...otherwise your just became another victim..sad but true...yes guys are jerks...especially horny manipulative ones....i know i use to be a guy...now im engaged....may god have mercy...tim....

Dam swabbies. I tried to warn ya about that sub mariner. No good conduct ribbon for him!!
Life goes on girl. Onward thru the fog Sara-onward thru the fog.

quote Originally posted by maryjane: Dam swabbies. I tried to warn ya about that sub mariner. No good conduct ribbon for him!! Life goes on girl. Onward thru the fog Sara-onward thru the fog.

Don't listen to him sara...

You know what they say, "when life hands you lemmons, throw them at passing cars."

After talking with one of my guy friends tonight, I finally realized that I was the stupid idiot that believed the jerk! Okay, I meet him a few weeks before he deploys, I go out with him a week before he leaves for 3 months, stuck on a sub, with other men, and if he's not gay, he wanted to get some a$$ before he left. It all made sense when my friend spelled it out for me! I shouldn't have been so stupid! Ugh!

But either way, not just this guy, but a whole bunch of them i've come across have been jerks. Maybe its the ones in VA, hmmm no....the one in MI wasn't much better, hmm, maybe try moving to NC to my moms and see what I come across? lol jk

quote Originally posted by sarabear: Okay, I meet him a few weeks before he deploys, I go out with him a week before he leaves for 3 months, stuck on a sub, with other men, and if he's not gay, he wanted to get some a$$ before he left. It all made sense when my friend spelled it out for me! I shouldn't have been so stupid! Ugh!

But, that brings up a question, and I'd kinda like to hear the answer from the ladies here, including you Sara.

IF the situation were reversed, and it was YOU about to be deployed on a 'long black never come back', boat (sub) full of women, what would you be doing your last week ashore? Now, those of you already in relationships, answer as if you were not please. (unless it will get you in trouble with your S.O.)

[This message has been edited by maryjane (edited 01-05-2005).]

I got to tell ya, I dont post alot on this forum because few things require my .02 and with all the big mouths out there I just as soon keep my trap shut..........BUT STOP THE PRESS.......

First of all there is nothing wrong with guys in the Navy. I am a naval veteran and I speak from experience.

Second luck doesnt exist, everything happens for a reason, its usually the result of something you have done, those unfortunate events in life that aren't self provoked are called tough sh!t.

Finally you prolly arent making such hot decisions yourself. If you have to look back and say, "I knew I shouldnt have slept with him, but he said he wanted a relationship." Its more than a little bit your fault you got used. You referred to HIM as the guy you went on a date with, my money says you didnt know him well enough to do anything with him. But you did, now your sorry, and on top of that you're gonna tell us and expect someone to feel sorry for you. I usually feel sorry for you because you have it as tough as I do, financially, and with family. Ive even talked with you on aim (Same SN) but this time I have to tell you to look in the mirror.

I am 21 and have the resonsibility of raising my 17 year old sister and taking care of my 59 year old father and I have my 20 year old girl friend living with me. So let me tell ya what I know from raising one chick and living with the other, ONE NIGHT STANDS DONT END IN MARRIAGE!!!!!!!!!! If they do it usually involves a shot gun and a court house.

Go listen to Michael Jacksons MAN IN THE MIRROR............

------------------
Failing to prepare - Is preparing to fail....

See Sara /\ there's the sailor you shoulda went out with, cept he's already been corraled.

i've had a LONG run with women who have turned out to be.....bad...let's just say that. some cheated. some just wanted money. some just wanted a place to crash for awhile until something better came along. Hence my motto.....it only takes one woman to make one man hate all women...

but, when i gave up looking. the most remarkeable woman enters into my life. a relationship started and i didn't even see it coming. i live in florida. she lived in pennsylvania. she was a friend of mine from years ago. she would come here for vacation and eventually, i couldn't stand to see her leave. she now lives here, with me. and i can honestly say i've never been happier in my whole life......well, there was one time when i caught two girls in my room together....

what i'm trying to say, and not doing very well at it is this...

stop looking. completely. that one great, attentive, loving person you really want and need in your life will find you. probably when you least expect it and maybe even someone you don't expect it to be.

Sara, take it from a one time looser, it wasn't you, the guys a jerk-off. Mike

quote Originally posted by WBailey1041:

Someone peed in your cornflakes today....

If you look at some of the things that i've posted, I fully admit and take responsibility for my actions. I was drunk when it happend (new years eve), yet you dont see me trying to use that as an excuse, heck I didnt even bring that into it until now.
And about trying to get people to feel sorry for me? C'mon now, please. I'm not out posting things to get people to feel sorry for me, i'm posting what happend to vent. There are many people who come onto this forum just to vent, we're all friends here....well some of us. I dont need people to feel sorry for me, my life isnt that bad, no need for sorrow.
Bad things happen to the best of us, and like I said, I'm not pinning the whole thing on him. BUT at the same time, he was the liar....not me.
And my comment about guys in the Navy, well I only speak from expierience, I've dated 3 guys who are in or were in the Navy and no good ever came from it, as well as guys in the Army and Air force. (Its kinda hard around here to find a guy who isnt in the military, like 4 naval bases, 2 army bases, AFB's etc) I'm not saying that ALL guys in the service are jerks, but its just a conclusion that i've come to based on what i've been through with them.

Or....

I could just say....Yes, I'm the little whore who let myself get used. I decided to sleep with a guy who I hardley knew and now I've gotten what I deserved. heh, yeah there we go....much better

[This message has been edited by sarabear (edited 01-05-2005).]

Sounds like a combination of bad guys and bad choices.

quote Originally posted by sarabear: But either way, not just this guy, but a whole bunch of them i've come across have been jerks. Maybe its the ones in VA

hey, cmon. I think myself to be a good person. but to answer you Q. I believe it to be like some of the others said, bad luck with a bad person. as to your frustration, completely normal, happens to best of us.

[This message has been edited by dohcfiend (edited 01-05-2005).]

Sara, I wouldn't call you a bad person, maybe way to gullable, but not bad.
Some guys, (notice I said some) would tell you anything to get in your pants. Just like some women use guys for all they are worth and then toss them aside.
You just have to wait awhile and find out what they really want, if they want a relationship then they will wait for you, now I'm not saying years or anything and I can't tell you how long to wait, but at least that way you could tell if they wanted you, and not just your butt. The guy probably isn't leaving on his deployment or maybe he is and he just loves using that line. You'll probably never know. Just learn from it and live your life.

Maryjane, as for your question, would I go looking for some action if I was faced with the fact of being cooped up with women for 6 months.
I'm a bit different from most people. It took Tom awhile before he got there with me. But then again I'm old, and was pretty much a goody two shoes back then.
I don't think I could go out looking for some azz. For me, if I was single (and I'm not saying anything about the way other people feel) I would need to know that there was something between that person and me in order for me to have sex with a guy. You can't find that out with just one "date" . Besides there are other ways to "um" relieve yourself if need be! The whole concept of picking someone up at a bar and taking them home is foreign to me. But then again, that's just me.

I guess the worst part of it all is that its completely out of character for me to do what I did. So having it end up like this just makes it that much worse. But as I said, yet another life lesson. I guess the only way to really learn in life is to expierience things, good or bad. If you havent noticed, i'm the type of person where I have to learn for myself. If you tell me i'm making a bad decision, i'm not going to listen until I actually expierience it myself. I'll take advice, and know for a fact that your right about something, but i'll completely ignore it until I go through it myself. Maybe not the best way to go about life, but its the way I am and I can't change it. So live and learn, and move on. I'll bet ya one thing.....its not gonna happen again!!!

YOU LITTLE SLUT SARABEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL J/K I dont think it's that your a bad person nor that is bad luck, I think this is just a simple case of bad judgements. Coming from another fuy's point of view sure I LOVE Cheap Dates that'll sleep on the first dates I mean what guy doesn't but for a relationship I look for a girl who I can talk to about cars and **** and can have fun with. You picking up what I'm laying down here? The whole point is don't fall for what a guy says cause if it's true that's he's looking for a real relationship he could just be testing you to see if you are a slut that might sleep with his best friend(I have tested girls like that before). So I guess what I'm saying is that if you weant a real relationship don't give fall for sweettalk and use good judgement. Your a nice girl you just haven't found the right guy.

quote Originally posted by sarabear: I could just say....Yes, I'm the little whore who let myself get used. I decided to sleep with a guy who I hardley knew and now I've gotten what I deserved. heh, yeah there we go....much better

Hey... look on the bright side. Atleast you got laid this year.
The only bad part is he decieved you. Not cool but it's a typical manuver.

Now... go back and re-read your dream..

quote Originally posted by 84Bill: Now... go back and re-read your dream..

Check back with me later, I just got home from work, and i'll be catching some sleep here soon....we'll see what kinda messed up dreams I'll have about this one!

SB...sorry to hear about what happened to yah.

You got caught up in the moment...we all do at one point or another...just enjoy and/or remember the pleasure that you experienced (if any) during that brief moment and forget all the petty stuff (guilt you've placed upon yourself in this case).

Look forward to tomorrow by moving on, as "Mr. Right" will and does come along...PROMISE!!! :)

quote shawnkfl: i've had a LONG run with women who have turned out to be.....bad...let's just say that. some cheated. some just wanted money. some just wanted a place to crash for awhile until something better came along. Hence my motto.....it only takes one woman to make one man hate all women...

:confused: You wouldn't happen to be talking about strippers now, would yah?! ;) :D

quote Originally posted by sarabear: Okay Bill, I dont remember much of anything, but I do remember a school bus....who dreams about a school bus?!?! I'm confused! lol

Hmmmm.........lots of children. Triplets ?

lol...no strippers. but they fit that pretty well. thank god they're gone my life!!

but lets all be honest here. guy and girls. EVERYBODY does the "no names, no regrets" thing once in awhile. we're human. it's good to get out and just "get some" without strings attached. i'm speaking from a singles standpoint of course.

quote Originally posted by sarabear: Its so hard to not just throw my arms up and say that I give up.

Oh god! We lost another one!

Ugh... fine... just get the damn pendant already...

j/k

but with men like this:

I can see the problem.