I can't believe it! I volunteer at the local retirement home for the convent, and frequently drive the van of retired nuns to errands in town, like tending to the bandages of leper panhandlers. Well, after handing out meals to the homeless we were at a stoplight in the Church Van when the Sisters decided to begin singing hymns of praise to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. As the youngest of these ladies are in their eighties, they can't sing very loud, but their fervor compensates. During the second verse of "Nearer My Lord To Thee", I heard a savage barking coming from the other side of my window! I turned and looked to see the snarling gleaming teeth of a savage Rottweiler flinging rabid foam against the half-open window of the 78 Dodge Van. The punk driving the lifted Jeep took a toke on his blunt and told me tp "Tell those old b1tches to shut the f*ck up, they're making Loco mad." I swear, I actually saw the dog ejaculate on the inside of the guys car, it was so aggressive. I tried to tell the guy guy that his dog was scaring the Sisters, but he just threw his Big Gulp at me and took off. What a punk, huh?
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02:18 PM
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RandomTask Member
Posts: 4540 From: Alexandria, VA Registered: Apr 2005
I can't believe it! I volunteer at the local retirement home for the convent, and frequently drive the van of retired nuns to errands in town, like tending to the bandages of leper panhandlers. Well, after handing out meals to the homeless we were at a stoplight in the Church Van when the Sisters decided to begin singing hymns of praise to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. As the youngest of these ladies are in their eighties, they can't sing very loud, but their fervor compensates. During the second verse of "Nearer My Lord To Thee", I heard a savage barking coming from the other side of my window! I turned and looked to see the snarling gleaming teeth of a savage Rottweiler flinging rabid foam against the half-open window of the 78 Dodge Van. The punk driving the lifted Jeep took a toke on his blunt and told me tp "Tell those old b1tches to shut the f*ck up, they're making Loco mad." I swear, I actually saw the dog ejaculate on the inside of the guys car, it was so aggressive. I tried to tell the guy guy that his dog was scaring the Sisters, but he just threw his Big Gulp at me and took off. What a punk, huh?
How did you react?
I'm sure the sisters looked at you with thier "What Would Jesus Do" eyes, you said a little prayer and continued your journey to a place of higher understanding. Good Man!
Dang you stimpy. My ribs hurt and you made it worse. Jesus would have replaced his soda with jesusjuice made from water.
Next time make sure you have a 6-pack of the stuff in your van, cans hurt worser than cups and you'll have sompthin to cool you off after if you manage to save one.
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06:10 PM
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carolinajoe Member
Posts: 822 From: Spring Hill,Fl. Registered: Feb 2005
Originally posted by Tinton: Rofl stimpy, I think you're the 2nd funniest guy on this board, the 1st being Rumor of course , the 3rd being....F-I-E-R-O. Excellent homage. rofl
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....
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07:41 PM
dezie36 Member
Posts: 2501 From: Moved to Okemos, Mi, USA Registered: Feb 2005
Keep them Nuns singing! Encourage them to sing as loud as they can. Hopefully someone will throw a soda can at you- save it. It can be used to make a fun project like the one illustrated below! See, there's always a bright side to everything...
listening to gospel music on the colored radio station
Wow Ken that’s the 2nd time you’ve made an incredibly insensitive statement... the first being the thing about "The founder of our countries wife" marrying a Jewish guy being a bad thing... I’m begging to think there’s something wrong with you; I know that several of my black friends would kick your ass for calling them colored.