My brother was in jail... he had issues with drugs & alcohol and he had held a young woman captive at his apartment and beat the living crap out of her... well he got out a little over a week ago. He's been scared (obviously, he was on the inside for 2 years) and unfortunately he went right back to the drugs and alcohol to comfort him.

Yesterday my dad stopped by his house in the morning and my brother was upset and depressed. My dad had some errands to run to pick up food and what not for the cook-out they were having for memorial day. My brother only lives about 10 blocks away from my apartment, so around 4:30 yesterday evening my dad asked me to stop by my brothers house and check on him and bring him with the the cook-out. I wasn't too fond of this idea, as I haven't been alone around my brother in YEARS, but I figured it's family and it would do him some good to get out of the house. So I went over. Rang the doorbell, no answer. Rang it again, still no answer. I called his friend who he had been hanging out with a lot lately (my brother doesnt have a phone in his apartment yet) and asked if he had seen my brother today. He said yes and that he had dropped him off at his apartment about an hour ago. I asked him if my brother had seemed depressed and he said yeah, kinda. So I kept ringing the doorbell and after about 5 more minutes he came down and opened the door. His eyes were red, bloodshot and puffy, I knew he had been drinking (could smell it on his breath) but I didn't know what other drugs he had done. He invited me up to see his apartment, I hesitated, but accepted.

Went up the stairs, he showed me around (not much to show) and then I asked him how he had been feeling. He said he was upset because he was such a f***-up and he didn't know why he was like he was and he started crying. I asked him if he felt suicidal at all and he said "yeah a little" (My brother has attempted suicide 19 times, the last time he tried I was the one who found him laying in a pool of blood on the floor of his kitchen) With that, I got my cell phone out of my pocket and I was going to call my dad and tell him to come over, that the cook-out was going to have to wait.

My brother watched me get my cell phone and start dialing, at which point he snapped. He knocked the cell phone out of my hand and threw me to the ground. I cracked my head on the edge of the bed and was more than a little stunned that this was my own brother doing this.. he held my one hand down as he grabbed my pocket knife out of *MY* pocket and held it to my throat threatening to kill me if I put him back in jail. At first I tried screaming rape hopeing to catch the neighbors attention, but he just pressed the knife into my throat harder. Then I tried to push the knife off my neck but i just ended up slicing myself even more so I stopped struggling and just cried. He was yelling at me to stop crying, that he was the one who should be crying cause his family hates him and he's the outcast. I started stomping my feet on the floor in an attempt to get him off my stomach and also again to alert the neighbors.

It seemed like forever but finally a police officer came through the door, then another. It took 3 officers to get my brother off me. I don't remember everything that happened anymore, I'm still kinda in awe of the whole thing. Everyone was telling me I should be afraid of my brotehr, but I didn't bleieve them. I never thought he would hjurt me. I'm his little sister! (I'm 21, he's 27). Other than being emotioanlly distraught, I have a slight cut on my neck from when I was fighting with him to get the knife off of me, but I'm fine... I just kinda needed somewhere to vent. My relationship of ten months, well, him & I broke up this weekend so as much as I wanted to call him and cry and go running to him and just have him hold me, I couldnt... Thanks for listening everyone, thats all I really needed...

[This message has been edited by CuriousFiero (edited 05-31-2005).]

Wow, I am sorry for your troubles and your brothers. It is hard for me to suggest what to do. It is understandable that you would want to run to your ex as he would understand your feelings and knows of your brother and the issues better than most. You might be putting one hurt on top of another.
Do not feel bad that your brother has more problems with the law. He would likely have had some anyway. You actually have given him a chance to help himself. Have you visited your brother since this has happened ? I do not know whether to suggest it but I think it would be a good idea if you can handle it.

Hey girl....I tried calling you back last night with no luck. I'm VERY sorry that happend to you! Im working 11am-7pm today, so if you want to, give me a call after that and we can talk! Take care hun!

-Sara

[This message has been edited by sarabear (edited 05-31-2005).]

Your brother doesn't need jail, he needs to go to an intitution that can help him with his problems and control his self medication. He needs to realize that alot of what he's taking can probably be described as depresants, so of course they will only make things worse in the long run. Take a look at facilities in your state and see if he would be abloe to get in. It will probably be against his will, but I think if you get two doctors to sign off on it there should be no problem. It sounds like it's more than a personality disorder, and could be helped with the right medication and counseling, but it wont happen over night. Good luck, this will be a very trying experience (as it has been so far) for you and your family.

quote Originally posted by F-I-E-R-O: Your brother doesn't need jail, he needs to go to an intitution that can help him with his problems

I hope this is an option. Is it possible for him to avoid more jail time if you don't press charges?

He needs to clean his body, clear his head, and find some SERIOUS inner peace. Hopefully professionals and family can help him with this.

Good luck.

-FR

Most of the mental health facilities in the STATE will not accept him. he's been in almost all of them and played the system to the point where they just refuse to take him. He didn't go back to jail, they took him to the state hospital, but he can sign himself out after 72 hours. I didn't press charges, and between getting my head checked out at the hospital (had a killer headache from cracking it on the edge of the bed, they wanted to make sure I didn't fracture my skull) and the statements I had to give to the police I was too exhausted to even get out of bed this morning for work, but I did. Thankfully I have long hair and can hide the cut. If anyone asks I'm just going to say my dog scratched me or something. I don't want to make his life harder, I know he needs help... He's been in and out of drug rehabs since he was 17 so obviously he's not open to the idea of help.

The funny (not haha funny) part about all of this is that I know self defense, and thinking back in retrospect, I know exactly what I could have and should have done, but it was my brother, and I didn't want to hurt him, and I couldn't believe it was happening...

When I was younger I used to sneak out of my bedroom and down the stairs into his room and we'd stay up late watching Bugs & Daffy on Cartoon Network and eating popcorn after our parents had gone to bed. I still can't believe it... He'll be out of the hospital on Thursday, I don't know whats going to happen then...

people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

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quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

I knew i was gonna get some ******* like you to make ac omment like that.... TOTALLY uncalled for, but hey, thanks for your input

His problems are worse than jail time could do anything for. He needs serious professional help. But it's not going to do him any good if he just signs himself back out. I know he's your brother, but you have to look out for yourself. DON'T put yourself in a position where you'll be alone with him. If you have to see him, make sure you have AT LEAST one other person there with you.

I'm going to PM you my new cell number. If you ever need to talk or anything at all, call me, ok? *HUGS*

Sorry for your troubles. My oldest son has just about the same resume with the law that your brother has. It's really too bad, he is very intelligent. He got arrested last year for his 5th parole violation. He has been in private counseling, inpatient facilities (5 different ones). He stole his first car at age 12.

My only advice is protect yourself, you are not responsible for you brothers actions. If he is willing, maybe he can get some help. If you have to, KICK HIM IN THE BALL$. Don't YOU become a statistic.......Good Luck.......Paul

quote Originally posted by Paul Prince: My only advice is protect yourself, you are not responsible for you brothers actions. If he is willing, maybe he can get some help. If you have to, KICK HIM IN THE BALL$. Don't YOU become a statistic.......Good Luck.......Paul

That would work on me, just don't try it on a unic...

Sorry for your troubles as well. I would try to make sure he gets the help he needs. But remember, watch out for yourself first. You already know he not afraid to hurt you so don't do anything that could put you in a dangerous situation with him. Also, sorry about the B/F thing, we guys have the best times of making a break up happen at the worse possible times... Good luck

Joe

I'm glad he didn't really hurt you, he could have gone as far as killing you. He needs real proffesional help and detox to get over his addiction problem. You should never go to see him alone again. You have to help him as he can't help himself anymore. If that means calling the cops on him, so be it. He is a danger to himself and others the way he is.

quote Originally posted by CuriousFiero: When I was younger I used to sneak out of my bedroom and down the stairs into his room and we'd stay up late watching Bugs & Daffy on Cartoon Network and eating popcorn after our parents had gone to bed

I appreciate the "good times". I am tearing up at the thoughts of mine.

quote Originally posted by CuriousFiero: He didn't go back to jail, they took him to the state hospital, but he can sign himself out after 72 hours. I didn't press charges,

quote Originally posted by CuriousFiero: Most of the mental health facilities in the STATE will not accept him. he's been in almost all of them and played the system to the point where they just refuse to take him.

You are being an "enabler". Reconsider my first post. You can give him a chance to help himself and that is the only way that you can help him. You can still press charges. I am not suggesting that you do. I just think you are allowing him to.............

quote Originally posted by CuriousFiero: Most of the mental health facilities in the STATE will not accept him. he's been in almost all of them and played the system to the point where they just refuse to take him.

.................play the system. They took him this time, they accepted him. Maybe when he figures out that he can not "play the system", things can be better. Not to be an alarmist, but as you can see, the system is tired of playing.
You are in a small boat on a large ocean. A lot of "what ifs".
CuriousFiero, no ideas from me, just thoughts.

Wow...

You might try and talk to the D.A. and find out if pressing charges can have any good outcome. I'm thinking along the lines of an involuntary commitment.

Sorry, I don't really have any useful advice.
Best of luck, though.

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

Just remembered why I gave you a neg. Shithead.

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

Tell me that the only reason you posted that is because you're stoned or drunk and not thinking straight. I have to agree with Raydar. You're a $h1thead.

Dave

quote Originally posted by Monkeyman: Tell me that the only reason you posted that is because you're stoned or drunk and not thinking straight. I have to agree with Raydar. You're a $h1thead. Dave

Count me as a third vote, Dave...

This place is swimming with them lately.

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quote Originally quoted by Tinton Go frack yourself stimpy, its a message board you jackass. You post something I'm free to say whatever the hell I want, you're not a moderator. If you want to control what people post in "your" threads then go make your own forum, let's see if anyone actually joins it. Oh yeah, you wanna hear the truth? Really I don't give a **** if you live or die. I probably wouldn't have noticed, and no one on the forum would notice for at least a few months until a "Where is Stimpy" thread popped up. By that time you'd be long underground *******.

quote Originally posted by Monkeyman: Tell me that the only reason you posted that is because you're stoned or drunk and not thinking straight. I have to agree with Raydar. You're a $h1thead. Dave

I've been saying it for years now, but no one listens to me, cause I might also be a shithead..

quote Originally posted by JohnnyK: I've been saying it for years now, but no one listens to me, cause I might also be a shithead..

We have been hearing it for years now, we quit listening, cause your not a shithead. Some times you act like it (J/K) Must have beem those punches to the head.

My take on JohhnyK......just like me but acts older.
edit
not older....wiser.

[This message has been edited by cliffw (edited 05-31-2005).]

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

This is the guy's sister you’re mouthing off to. What a thoughtless, callous, prick you are.

It's too bad we can each only give a single negative rating, otherwise you'd be outta here pronto.

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

I for some reason had you as a positive and I know we have disagreed. I do not know that we ever agreed. The reason I had you rated positive was "real". I am not sure why I noted that. That was a pretty callous thing to say so, I have re-thought my opinion. I am gonna put you back to nuetral, not that I think you care.

[This message has been edited by cliffw (edited 05-31-2005).]

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

I don't even know where to begin with this one. I've seen, experienced, and tried to help people who have tried to commit suicide. This is not a joking matter or one that should ever be taken lightly or sarcastically. Until you experience the pain, confusion, utter sense of desperation of a person who is willing to do this to themselves- you will never understand how devastating this experience can be. Sometimes the only way a person who is in such pain can deal with things is to take things into there own hands. Often times, they do this by self medicating. When despair reaches its limits, the pain and sense of hopelessness as well as loneliness and a desire to stop hurting others because of their actions; the only solution (in their mind) is to end their life. I pray that nothing ever happens to you that would cause you to experience any of these things. It is a form of hell on Earth that too many people suffer from. The reason so many people try is because they feel that they either don't deserve compassion, or have no one to show them that emotion. In your case, a potentially suicidal person would hardly have a chance. Some friend you'd make, thank God that you weren't my friend a few months ago.

.

[This message has been edited by BigRed88 (edited 06-19-2005).]

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

The comment WAS insensitive and unsupportive.
I wonder though, if he was trying to comment on the guys violent actions.

Example:
"I can understand the depression and despair that could cause a person to want to take his own life. What I DON'T understand is how depression and despair with one's OWN life, could cause a person to put a knife to THEIR OWN sisters throte!"

Maybe the statement is so raw that I'm forceing myself to read more into it then is actually there, to keep from dealing with the fact that a person could really feel that way about a another person, plauged with such problems.

Then again, maybe It is exactly what it seems.
I hope not.

quote Originally posted by Liquid-Reality: people like that need to die. Next time he tries to kill himself let him.....

Totally uncalled for! I am resisting the urge to join the bandwagon with a - for you. As the adage goes, "if you have nothing good to =say, then say nothing at all" Maybe you should try it in this instance.

Curious Fiero, I am sorry to hear of all the troubles with your brother. Hopefully he will get help for his substance abuse problems. I agree with those that say jail is not the answer.

[This message has been edited by topcat (edited 05-31-2005).]

Wow!!!!!! I'm in awe! I'm glad your alive CuriousFiero, that is really freaky. Thankfully the cut barely got you, but it's still freaky that you could have almost passed away. If your brother does indeed get help and is "better" down the road, I would still always have someone with me if you ever see/visit him again. Once again, glad you weren't seriously hurt(or almost killed).

quote Originally posted by Patrick: This is the guy's sister you’re mouthing off to. What a thoughtless, callous, prick you are.

Not to be a pain or w/e, but from the just of the story and Sarabear's comment i'm guessing CuriousFiero is a female correct??? Maybe I read it wrong, sorry if I did.

Gee glad you're okay! That is really scary! Is he your parent's biological kid?

(Finale - this is the PFF'er formerly known as Marrilow) so yes, she's female!

quote Originally posted by Fierochic88: Gee glad you're okay! That is really scary! Is he your parent's biological kid? (Finale - this is the PFF'er formerly known as Marrilow) so yes, she's female!

Thanks FieroChic88, I figured she was female but Patrick's post confused me a little lol. I've seen her a few times around on PFF(marrilow on her old s/n lol). Thanks for clearing that up.

I'd like to also add, I hope your brother get's the help he needs and gets well. Also keep your spirits up too CuriousFiero/Marrilow

Hey Kiddo, there is never a dull moment with you is there?
I'm sorry that had to happen to you, please don't ever see him alone again!
I know he's your brother, but something is definitely messed up in his head.
I hope he gets the help he needs, and I hope he wants that help!

On another note, I'm sorry to hear about Brian (?) I know you had it bad for him.

I wish you well, and you know where to get ahold of me if need be.

-Dar

quote Originally posted by Fiero Finale: I figured she was female but Patrick's post confused me a little.

How so?

I said:

quote Originally posted by Patrick: This is the guy's sister you’re mouthing off to. What a thoughtless, callous, prick you are.

My post was directed at Liquid-Reality (who I had originally also quoted) whose disgusting comments were in response to CuriousFiero’s frightening story about her brother.

I don’t understand how my post could be confusing to you.

I know from repeated experiences that there is not always anything you can do. I understand that because this is a loved one that this sounds impossible but it is true. Whatever has happened in the past to lead up to this cannot be reversed. If he can get the right kind of help and is WILLING he can get off the "helpers" and perhaps learn to live with his demons. You have done what you can do, you pointed him in the right direction. NOW SAVE YOURSELF! Don't go near him. Do anything you feel inclined to do to help without getting within 1/4 mile of him. You may have to resolve that you have lost him. If so, I am truly sorry for your loss. I do know exactly how it feels. I've experienced it more than once. DO NOT LET HIM TAKE YOU WITH HIM!

Hang in there the world needs you and your experiences. Don't allow his demons to be your demons. Fight on!

As for Liquid-Reality: When and if you actually kill someone you love in this kind of condition, while your standing at the bathroom sink washing the blood off your hands look in the mirror and ask yourself "Who won?". Then you can spend the rest of your life convincing yourself you did the right thing even if you had no choice! Don't ever believe that this situation can be resolved by a bullet or a blade or whatever. The pain goes on much longer than the life of the tormented individual!

Wow glad your ok. I know where your comming from I have a cousin that acts the same way all crazy and stuff. It sem like you take those self defence classes but when you really need them it all goes out of you head. Hope you throat feels better.

Angie

Do they still practice lobotomy in mental homes?

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This sig sucks

quote Originally posted by IEatRice: Do they still practice lobotomy in mental homes?

That's a negatory... And besides, what's with all the negative, very dry humor? I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I don't think humor of such tenacity belongs in this thread.

quote Originally posted by Patrick: My post was directed at Liquid-Reality (who I had originally also quoted) whose disgusting comments were in response to CuriousFiero’s frightening story about her brother. I don’t understand how my post could be confusing to you.

I didn't mean it in a bad way, it just confused me cause he said something about her brother that wasn't nice. Then you said that wasn't nice cause this is this guys's sister....you just reversed the people. Or maybe i'm misreading it somehow.......idk sorry bout that Patrick I was just sayin I got confused a little.

So CuriousFiero is the cut(head wound too?) gone yet?? Like I said above, take care and i'm glad your safe.

(EDIT: I re-read what you said Patrick a few times and I did indeed misread & misinterpret what you said. I was a bit tired and had to leave when I intially posted that comment. Sorry bout that)

[This message has been edited by Fiero Finale (edited 06-01-2005).]

Does it belong in this thread, no. Only because the individual is a loved one of the thread starter. If this were a news story and someone posted it up, most of these comments would have been made with no one caring. The real problem is most people lose track of common curtousy when they are on the internet because there is such a loose connection with the people you are conversing with.

Now back on topic. As much as it hurts, there really isn't much you can do to help(read fix) your brother. If he honestly wants to come clean he will seak/accept help which you've stated he has ignored. If you are still thinking about pressing charges, just remember if he was willing to do that to you, his own sister, imagine what he could do to someone he doesn't know. I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but he obviously has problems and he's obviously dangerous to those around him. I don't know what I would do in your situation but that would definately weigh heavy on my concious if he hurt someone and I knew I had the power to prevent it in any way.

I'm sure you've already thought about this but if you are around him in the future try and keep it in a safe environment with other people that can help protect you. Next time a police officer may not come.

I'm sorry about your brother and I hope things get better for you.

-Sacred

quote Originally posted by Fiero Finale: (EDIT: I re-read what you said Patrick a few times and I did indeed misread & misinterpret what you said. I was a bit tired and had to leave when I intially posted that comment. Sorry bout that)

No problem. I wasn't offended by anything you said, just surprised.

quote Originally posted by Fiero Finale: So CuriousFiero is the cut(head wound too?) gone yet?? Like I said above, take care and i'm glad your safe.

Cut isn't gone yet, but it's not that bad. I can almost pass it off as an animal scratch of some type that went bad. The guy I was seeing gave me some dit da jow to use on it to help heal and it works wonders even though it stings a little (if anyone of you know what that is, it's amazing stuff. I had to use it on my wrists as well cause it works great for bruises too). If I remember I'll take a pic later tonight. My head is okay, I have a scab which I picked open last night by accident while scratching my head and bled all over, but that was my own dumb fault. Thanks for the concern everyone... its just kinda a rough time. The guy I was seeing is insisting I press charges because now my brother is holding a grudge against me and he's worried he'll come back after me (which I fully believe at this point) so I don't know what I'm going to do yet...

[This message has been edited by CuriousFiero (edited 06-01-2005).]

Get a restraining order at least. Please. It's your choice if you press charges, it may keep him away from you longer, probably won't hurt him. Just be careful. Please.