Dear Fiero Forum,

I never thought that it would happen to me - There I was, strolling down the street, minding my own business when suddenly,

*FLAMM-O!*

from around the corner comes this huge Covid.

I could tell that it was a nasty variant, its rippling biceps and its protein spikes looked particularly menacing.

(I could tell that he lifted.)


Well, even before I could prepare myself, that guy took three large strides and jumped directly into my FACE!

He smashed against my mask and then (because they are 95% effective against particles and Covidses) he bounced off and I ran away and I am still alive THANKS TO MY HIGHLY EFFECTIVE MASK.


If you happened to read this on the internet, it must be TRUE!

So if you if you find yourself strolling down the street, minding your own business and suddenly hear *FLAMM-O!* , quickly slip on your mask and then wait for the impact on your face, then you can immediately remove it because the immediate threat is gone. unless there is more than one Covid particle nearby... in that case, keep that mask on. or if you are inside (or outside) then, just keep that mask on all the time. except when you asleep (unless you are sleeping indoors or outdoors) then wear a mask.


Science shows that trapped particles can't cause infection, so maybe just slap on a few glue traps on your face. just be careful about the facial hair.

PS-

STAY SAFE! and beware of "Unacceptable ideas!"

and go get your shot(s)*

*There are several different ones available, but I recommend this variety:



NOTE: THIS IS PARODY - I AM NOT OFFERING OR SUGGESTING MEDICAL ADVICE OR BACK MASSAGES OW OW OW STOPHITTINGMEEE

[This message has been edited by TheDigitalAlchemist (edited 01-27-2022).]

quote Originally posted by Cliff Pennock: Wearing a mask to stop virus particles, is like using chicken wire for an umbrella.

Add some flexseal and you're good to go!
https://youtu.be/lrQKFmje6so?t=130


*FLAMM-O!*

OH SNAP, Cliff, loookouuuuut! it's right behind you!

*ducks and puts on his mask*

[This message has been edited by TheDigitalAlchemist (edited 01-27-2022).]

"from around the corner comes this huge Covid..."

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Dr. Ian Malcolm: Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.
(Jurassic Park)

The Ogre's Fiero Cave

THAT’S HIM!!! AHHHHH!!!

[This message has been edited by TheDigitalAlchemist (edited 01-27-2022).]

quote Originally posted by Cliff Pennock: Wearing a mask to stop virus particles, is like using chicken wire for an umbrella.

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