hello to all.
First off, it may have taken nearly a year to make any good on the orders that were never completed, but I made a promise to myself that by x-mas people would either have their money back or the product they ordered. So infront of me now is a stack of envelopes with money orders in them which will be mailed out to their rightful owners within the next couple of hours. Some of you may have forgotten, but I haven't and feel the need to make things right before I go. I really do miss the Fiero Community and the sense of being it had instilled in me, but too much time has passed, too many things have happened. It's just that time.
Not that anybody really cares, and not that I want to put any of this on you guys, but I have nowhere else to leave this and need to get it off my chest. Alot of things have happened in the past year. A steady, fast paced downhill slope of events which I just can't deal with anymore and have no desire to look for better ways out anymore. Everywhere I've turned there has been a brickwall. I know the choices I have made were of my own, and many of them lead me to where I'm at. So I blame nobody for my actions. I've been alone on this earth for as long as I can remember and will leave this earth alone. I'm not going to go into a long winded letter explaining things because at this point, it doesn't really matter. Those who I owe money to, keep an eye out for those money orders, I hope it brings a little bit more happiness to your holiday. Best wishes to all of you. Michael.

Don't do what I think you're inferring.....as bad as things are for you, they COULD be much worse. I really don't know what else to say, as I don't know you, nor have any way to get in touch with you. But think about what you're doing. Please. People DO care. There's ALWAYS a way out...you just have to look hard enough.

Whoa there Mr.

Are you saying goodbye to the forum or am I reading something else into this note?
You can't just leave it all hanging like that. You see, I'm the kind of person that cares too much about everyone.
So, leaving it like that means it will bother me for quite some time. You have some explaining to do!

Dude, please just do whatever it takes to get through the holidays, and then come back on here as a new username. Take some time away from here (and the internet in general, and try to "get away".

Please PM me your address, I'll send you a bunch of crap that, even if it doesn't "help" you, at least it will help you to pass the time.

And don't do anything stupid. That "S" word is simply NOT allowed. Don't make me suit up...It's raining right now, and I HATE walking around being the "soggy banana of vengence."

Hell , If life is THAT bad right now, I'll send YOU the suit, and then you can run around being the banana of vengence, the fruit of fury.

But seriously, please PM me your address, I'm sure at least ONE of the things I send you will keep you interested.

and No, I'm not just some stupid idiot fool on the internet, I'm not in your head, haven't lived your life, but I HAVE been down that road, where the final solution seemed a viable choice. where things were soooo F'ed up, it is hard to even put it into words. I've been there, and was able to come back and be the Dopey idot I am today. Don't worry, results may vary, so when you do blossom into your flower of positivity maybe you will not be as dopey as me. I have no desire to find that street again, and would do almost anything in my power to drag others from that dark place.
Even if others badmouth you for making bad deals, if you send those money orders out, I hope they can accept the fact that perhaps things were rough for you, and you did you best to make things right again.

Hafta go...leave if you must, but come back.

please.
(and PM me yer address, I'll send the stuff tomorrow morning.)

-FR

[This message has been edited by FieroRumor (edited 12-01-2004).]

Remembering back,

You had a business and lost it in a card game.
So.........you have enough brains to start a new business

Dating married ladies and hanging out with strippers.......
Go find yourself a NICE girl!

Blowing your money on drugs
GET HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
You once got clean...you can do it again.
You can have a good life, it will just take time and patiences.
It's worth the effort!!!! YOU are worth the effort.

Someone who cares enough to send peoples money orders back cares!
Don't do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are a good person inside. Bring it out!!!!!!

I'm not afraid to say it, but I'm reading this as a suicide note, and I'm sure others do too. If not, I apologize for reading too much into it and perhaps embarrasing you. But if it is, then I really must say something. Anything. Without beating around the bush. But I really have no idea what you're feeling right now. I know quite a few people that were/are suicidal, and apparantly, in their eyes life wasn't worth living. For whatever reason. And anything I or anyone else said didn't seem to matter. Because for them, life did suck.

So all I could say is, no matter how bad things seem at this stage in your life, one day - could be next week, could be in a few years, could be when your 90, something will happen that makes it all worthwhile. And you really owe it to yourself to wait it out. I can't tell you what that will be. Maybe you'll find the love of your life, maybe you win the lottery, maybe aliens will land in front of the white house, maybe they find a cure for cancer, I dunno. But I'm convinced that for everyone that special day will come. Yours hasn't come yet. But believe me, it will.

And by ending your life, you are not getting rid of your misery. You are actually passing it on to friends and family. They will have to live with that grief for the rest of their lives. And believe me, people do care. You might think you are alone and nobody cares but you are not. You never are. And you never will be.

So pick one of those envelopes in front of you, preferably from the person you like the least, take that money and go to a bar. Start talking to complete strangers. Go and try to have some fun. Or whatever it takes to cheer you up a bit.

quote Originally posted by Cliff Pennock: people do care.

I agree with all the others, take a break, then come back under a new username.

Suicide is no way out and will cause a lot more heartache for everyone else.

Send me a PM if you want to talk.

Jason

I care.

I care.... Does anyone on this forum have an address for him? If so please PM me as soon as possible.

Dude...
I don't even know you from Adam's housecat. But the thought of you doing somethng... bad... just brings tears to my eyes.
Do you understand? I don't even know you beyond a screen name and a few hundred posts on an internet forum.
And * I * care.

Man I think these guys have you all wrong.You couldn't be thinking of doing that.Paying off your debts wishing a merry holiday and all.
Suicide is not what you see when your setting things right.When you reach a point low enough and decide to make it right thats when you have nothing to lose and the most freedom you will ever have.Think of the power you have with nothing to lose only improvement.
Taste a little freedom and then tell me what you want to do next.

If were on this dumb subject anyway I will tell you I would never do it but if I was concidering it I would have to milk it for all its worth.Do everything I always wanted to do and talk to everyone and tell em what I really want and how I feel.
I would get back into dancing and martial arts and working with kids and and and and and My god I wish i could go do all those things again.

That does it I quiting every thing and I'm off to what god sent me here to do.
Sorry to be selfish but I can't waste my time with you I got to get busy.Times wasting!!!!!

------------------

People that rate at the drop of a hat can kiss my lily white azz and If you don't like it I'd be proud to sport a negative from you.

And folks always remember to eat before driving on the coast.If you fly off the cliff and no one finds you the only thing worse than knowing you are going to bleed to death alone is to do it hungry.
PLAY HARD-DIE FAST

No matter how dark the road may look ahead, all it takes is to ask and generally someone will bring a light. I will assume this is just such a request and you can see what it has started. Speaking from personal experience, I know it is never as bad as you or some jerk tells you it is. Now if you are letting that "jerk" we all have the capacity to be, make decisions for you, step away from your decision making process for just a second and share with someone else. You might be surprise how much the "things" don't mean and how much equity you really have in your friends and family.
Peace and Happy Holidays.

If you need someone to talk to, or to sit down with and chat, I'm available. I don't know where you are in the state, but I'm in Milwaukee.

I'll PM my phone numbers.

Mark

I'm heading out for the evening. If you wish to talk, PM me, and we'll work something out.

[This message has been edited by Mach10 (edited 12-01-2004).]

Nobody needs to call the cops anymore.

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: Nobody needs to call the cops anymore.

Found you through your ISP huh?

No. I know who called. I'd just rather not say.

Anything we can do to help?

Now you have to check in every once in awhile so we all know you are doing okay.
If you need to talk, we are all a pm away!

I believe it could be said that everyone here cares rather a lot. I don't want to see any of my Fiero buddies get hurt! Take care of yourself man.

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: No. I know who called. I'd just rather not say.

That should tell you Somebody cared enough to call them. Someone very special in my life tried to end it a few yrs back, but will tell you today it was the craziest thing she ever did. The 1st words out of her mouth when she regained consciousness was " I don't want to die." Hang in there Michael. Life has a way of turning around.

Sounds like you are putting things right, don’t do something to tarnish that. You may have just gotten side tracked because of the holidays, but its time to get back on track. Its time to live for today, tomorrow will take care of itself. Look I don’t know you, but you would have never came on here and posted if you didn’t want some help. Who do you owe money to? Was it a large amount? Seems to me I remember something about some window tint. Look I know if it was me I would just let it go and consider it a gift to a fellow Fiero Nut. I have gave away stuff that cost a lot more. You don’t owe me anything, but if you need some help send me an e-mail and we can work something out leberg@gmail.com Take care
Jake

Hang in there bud we're all here for you!

Jen

Never apply a permanent solution to a temporary problem. The great thing about life is that no matter how bad its gets, it always gets better somehow.

Someone called the cops. That means that someone cares. So you were wrong about that.

Several people have written to you in this thread. I don't see ONE person saying "yeah, go ahead and do it". That means people here care. That means you aren't alone, even though there may not be someone there physically at this precise moment. So you were wrong about that.

You say you've missed the Fiero community, but too much time has passed. You were sitting there with a pile of money orders, making good on your promises. The funny thing about Fiero people is that when someone makes an honest effort to right their wrongs, Fiero people seem ready to forgive them, and welcome them back into the fold. So you were wrong about that.

There are quite a few people that have PM'd you with their phone numbers or email addresses. If you hadn't made an impression upon them...if they hadn't cared...do you think they would have done that?

It seems as though you've been wrong about several things in your original message, Michael. If so...doesn't that mean that you could be wrong about hitting a brick wall every way you turn?

There is always a way out. You just have to be strong....you have to want it...and you have to have enough humility to ask for help. People are ready to help you...but they can't, if you don't want them to.

I hope that now, you want them to...or, at least, will think about it.

Hey man... You are NEVER dealt a hand that you can not deal with. There are times when we are ... tested. All that you need to do is keep the faith in yourself because there is nothing this life can throw at you that you can't handle. It's not just sunshine I'm blowing up your arse here, it's a fact.

This time last year I hit the lowest of lows (just ask anyone who knows me on this forum) but I knew ... I KNEW for a fact that it was just a passing situation and it would only take some time to get through it. Don't get me wrong, "some" people on this forum can be real asshuls but even they can keep you on track IF you have faith in yourself and KNOW the trouble will pass. That's not to say you must be happy with it, it just means you need to just deal with it. When life pushes you, push back but always go with it. It makes you a MUCH better person in the end.

Trust me, I had my life turned upside down last year, I'm still recovering but man.... I am the luckiest guy in the world now. I'm FINALLY getting some breaks, and when it rains, it pours.

It will work out, it always works out. You just have to be patient and it will come you'll see.

[This message has been edited by Fierofreak00 (edited 12-02-2004).]

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: Not that anybody really cares, and not that I want to put any of this on you guys, but I have nowhere else to leave this and need to get it off my chest. Alot of things have happened in the past year. A steady, fast paced downhill slope of events which I just can't deal with anymore and have no desire to look for better ways out anymore. Everywhere I've turned there has been a brickwall. I know the choices I have made were of my own, and many of them lead me to where I'm at. So I blame nobody for my actions. I've been alone on this earth for as long as I can remember and will leave this earth alone.

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: I've been alone on this earth for as long as I can remember and will leave this earth alone.

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: Not that anybody really cares,

Michael, you know, sometimes people do not recognize their blessings. They can not see that they are in a forest because the trees are in the way.
There are quite a few people on this earth who can not stand to be alone. You are not one of them and neither am I. These people who can not appreciate being alone are missing out. You see, we can appreciate both worlds. Being alone has given me confidence. Confidence in general, and more importantly, confidence in myself. The people who can not appreciate being alone can not make lemonade. They want it made for them. They do not even have the freedom that you and I share.
Being alone can suck ! I have cussed it also. Today I sit here and would not trade it for anything. People who are rich are unhappy. Not all but many. Also, people who have a large support network (spouse, family, friends, community, church) sometimes would like to bypass all the complications these can bring.
Along with the confidence in myself being alone has provided, I also have developed a hugh sense of pride. Everyone likes a pat on the back and to many of these people are too quick to pat themselves on their back. Why ? To impress the people in their lives. My pride is of me for me !
You made a gesture which shows how rich in spirit you are. One which shows how much better you are than many. This gesture of resolving outstanding debts. Not so much for the money, but for your heart. The world needs more hearts like yours. I do not know about you, but when I feel at my lowest, I take great consolance in my heart. Nothing picks me up quicker than going out and helping someone.
As you can see, you are not alone ! Not only that, you can see you are cared for.

quote Originally posted by FieroFanaticus2: A steady, fast paced downhill slope of events which I just can't deal with anymore and have no desire to look for better ways out anymore. Everywhere I've turned there has been a brickwall.

I have also felt like this and you know what ? It only got worse. You need not look for a better way out. You already know the way. We that have been alone know we can do it ourselves because we have had to all our lives. I am so good at it I can take down a brickwall blindfolded laying on my back. You know the routine.....one foot in front of the other. You know the secret to sucess......quit taking two steps back for every one step forward. Hard at first as you know, but surely you have not forgot that the pace gets easier and quicker. Life is full of peaks and valleys. We can never know what is over that next hill.
Life handed you a lemon and you say you are to blame for being in the "want lemon" line. Make some lemonade.

It's pretty obvious that there are lots of people that care about you. I've hit rock bottom before, it really sucks. But one good thing is that it always gets better. It may take awhile and a lot of effort, but it will get better. If you want to talk you can IM me on AIM or Yahoo, the name is Jaygee79.

I don't know you and you don't know me but we're both on the same forum so somehow then we're connected and always just a pm away...........in short............I CARE............just keep in mind my dad always told me" God never gives us more than he knows we can handle although it seems to us we can't" you are here because you are a part of his greater plan have faith and ask for help when and if you need it that is his plan for all of us to put you somewhere that people care enough to get involved for someone who we don't know to help even if it's just listening and having compassion for someone who thinks noone does.

Take Care of Yourself

Gin-a

Bump

The 3 most important words on the universe are:

Let Me Help.

You have freinds reaching out to you here. Let 'em in. Whatever is going on your life right now, someone here has been through before.

Let Us Help

He isn't going to kill himself guys.
He just has some indigestion.
This too shall pass.

Hey buddy, I know that my reply comes a little bit late but PLEASE, take it from somebody that has truly been there and back, there will be a tomorrow if you let it be. Time truly does heal all wounds. The sun comes up and we are all handed another day if we just use the patience that we are created with.

Listen to Cliff and Darlene, they give good advice. Sometimes it helps to just know that somebody cares.

If you check some of my threads, I lost the love of my life this year after 28 years and raising a family. It was a brutal thing to endure. I wrote a goodbye letter & woke up in the ER. Not a pretty sight. I am on the uphill side again and looking forward to a long and rewarding life once more... no matter where it may be. Believe me, you are not alone but there is enoubh pain in the world without adding to it. PLEASE pm me if you need to talk! There is help... there is always an alternative.

God bless,

Gordo

Anyone heard from FieroFanaticus2 lately? It's been a few days. Someone please post here if they've been in contact with him.

Dave

We all have our arguments in here, but in the end we ARE a big family. We got your back, just ask.

------------------

www.FieroLoki.com

I just read this thread and am sitting here with tears in my eyes. I have been where you are. I climbed back on top, great job, great family....... Then one day I stood outside my body and watched as I counted out 42 sleeping pills (all I had) and downed them with a pint of vodka. I left a note so nobody would think it was their fault. I awoke in the hospital and found myself in Hell. My kids were around me crying, my wife was dumbfounded and all I could think about was why I was still alive. If not for yourself think about those you would leave behind. Sometimes it is all you have.

Good luck. I will PM you my phone number. I have been there!

BTW - this was my 2nd attempt.